Photo via PostSecret.Everything happens for a reason.
This is a commonly used phrase, often used by people trying to justify or make sense of life's negative experiences. This is also a phrase that makes me want to throw rotten food items at said people's faces.
I suppose one can argue that everything does happen for a reason, in some sense. The Holocaust happened because Hitler was a charismatic sociopath and enough people bought into what he was saying. Thousands of women are raped daily because, despite living in a modern, "civilized" world, there are still an abundance of lowlife scumbags everywhere.
Sure, these instances happen(ed) for a reason, just not any sort of good reason. One might say bad or damn awful reasons. However, when people tend to use the phrase "everything happens for a reason," it's usually in the context of justifying bad things happening under the notion that some good will come out of them.
I would not recommend using this phrase for several reasons. One, it makes the phrase user sound naïve, dense, and unsympathetic. Two, it's unoriginal and does not promote further investigation into why events happen. Most importantly, though, it trivializes horrendous events.
First, saying everything happens for a reason often demonstrates that an individual has not experienced enough to understand that very bad things often happen to very good people. It also suggests to me that the phrase user has lived life pretty easily. Recently, when teenage pop star Justin Bieber was asked about his views on abortion in the case of rape or incest, he defended his pro-life stance by saying, "everything happens for a reason."
Noted, this is a sixteen-year-old pop star, and any reasonable adult would probably not take heed to (or care about) his political stance. However, there are also a number of adults who agree with his stance. To me, these adults will be placed at the same level as this teenage pop star. At least he has being sixteen as an excuse.
Second, using the phrase can become a roadblock for investigating further into events. One can relate it to religious folk claiming that God, gods, or the universe have a Plan for Us All. As a non-religious person, I might even agree that there could be an Ultimate Fate of the Universe of some sort, but not that every action that ever happens contributes to this Ultimate Fate. When people decide to not further investigate and/or ignore what is causing climate change around the world because, don't worry, it's out of our hands and everything happens for reason, then it becomes a major issue. Then said people are also classified under my first point.
Lastly, claiming that everything happens for a reason trivializes, well, just about everything. Oh, your best friend was tortured for seven days before being murdered? Don't worry, it was for a reason. There are children starving all around the world, and they'll never know a better life before they slowly and painfully die of malnutrition? Don't worry, it's for the greater good.
Sorry, am I being too much of a Negative Nancy? Well, in that case, saying everything happens for a reason trivializes good things that happen as well. You got your lower class self into an Ivy League school on full ride because you worked your ass off every day and night? Oh, it's just so you can contribute to mankind's destiny.
In conclusion, people who use this phrase may naïvely have the best of intentions. However, I will still be greatly tempted to throw a rotten tomato at their face.
